Sep 25, 2019

Vietnam (Intro): I Was Hit By A Bike

I never got hit by any vehicles in other countries before, so here's to the first time encountering it. 

If any of you guys follow my Instagram: @dyllarezan, you probably noticed that I just came back from Hanoi, Vietnam. One of the things in my to-do-list while waiting for housemanship is to update my travel experience for these past few years. I should continue with my India trip first, then continue with China, Taiwan, Bandung, Brunei, and a few local trips. Anyway, allow me to skip all those and publish posts about my most recent trip to Hanoi first hehe. 

Traffic in Hanoi was more or less like India and Indonesia. I was not surprised by the honks anymore, not like the first day when I was in India (click this link to read it; India Trip Day 1 Part 1 -Airport and Honk) hehe. One thing for sure, just like India, you had to be super brave to cross the road. Like, super super brave, or else you will never get to the opposite. Forever. Haha that's kinda exaggerated, but it was scary, especially during peak hour. 

Everyone knows Melaka has a lot of traffic lights. So as Vietnam. But, one thing in Vietnam is it would be very bizarre if a Vietnamese follows the traffic light all the time. I remember looking at a t-shirt showing a picture of a traffic light as below; 

They themselves know that they don't obey the traffic light rules haha. And it was even mentioned by our tour guide to Halong Bay. 

Anyway, on Day 3, since we just reached Hanoi from Sapa very early in the morning, we decided to just stroll around Hanoi on that day. We walked a few kilometers from our hostel, stopped by at a coffee shop, then to a lake, etc. I already planned on places we should go, and at 7pm we were supposed to go to Hanoi Train Street to see the train passes through that street. It was almost 7pm and the train street was quite far from our stop, so Sobri booked a Grabcar. The traffic was already hectic, and Grabcar or taxi would simply stop anywhere by the roadside. Vietnamese people are so pro that even though they rarely use brakes and obey the traffic lights, there was no accident happens. 

For me, I was quite confused with the roads and lanes. Sometimes due to cars stopping by the roadside, they drove on the opposite lane instead and it made me thought that it was one way. Our Grabcar to Hanoi Train Street already reached and the driver stopped his car by the roadside, blocking other vehicles from the same direction, and we had to cross the road. The road was super, super busy that time. It was a main road and at a peak hour. There were 2 lanes, but cars from my right side going on both lanes and somehow I forgot it was not a one-way road. I already looked on my left side and there was no car or bike coming, and when I looked on my right side, I noticed the car towards us was stopping, so I thought maybe the car was giving us way to cross the road. I forgot it was a 2-way road, and clever me just crossed the road, heading towards the Grabcar. 

And baaammmm! 

Something hit me from the left side and my sister screamed while pulling me at the same time. It happened in a split second. I was still standing upright, but stunned. I looked at the bike rider. He was holding a phone. My sister told me that he was playing with his phone when his bike hit me. 

Surprisingly, he only gave me a glance and left us, without even saying 'Sorry'. I tried my best to be 'husnudzon' (think positive) at that time. Maybe he was in a rush for something really important. Maybe. I crossed the road with Ica and Haniza and entered the Grabcar quickly. There was mild pain on the left side of my pelvis. Dah sudah. But alhamdulillah the pain slowly relieved and there was no bruise or swelling. 

From that day I learned that although you should be brave, but you should never underestimate it. Here's a quick view on how was the traffic on a not-so-busy day. 

Sep 14, 2019

KonMari: Don't Judge My Room

Here are some before and after photos of my room. 
But before you look at them, promise me you won't judge hehe. 

Assalamualaikum and hi guys!

Have you heard about KonMari method? It's a method of organising things from clothes, to books, kitchen utensils and tools, miscellaneous, etc. The most important thing is to keep things that spark joy only. The KonMari was founded by Marie Kondo. I'm a HUGE fan of Tidying Up with Marie Kondo series.

If you know me well, you'd know how much I love organising and tidying stuff. Nah-uh, not OCD, because I do all these willingly, and in fact, actually I'd feel a bit stressful if my things are not organised. Organising makes life easier, trust me. You organise your things, you know where you put them, you place them back after using it and you'll never have to search for them since you already know where they are. And a plus point is, your room will always look neat! 

But, I've never really had a chance to tidy up my things when I was in medical school. I was rarely at home and things just piled up more and more especially after every transition phase in medical school; Bukit Jalil to Seremban and Seremban to Kluang. Besides, my younger sister and brother put their things in this room as well, so just imagine how unorganised, untidy, and really semak the room was.

We even called this room 'Bilik Aib' or in English is The Disgrace Room haha.

At times when we did not know where to put our stuff, we'd dump them in this room with the hope that one day we'll clean it up and tidy it clean. That 'one day' finally came after 5 years haha. Since I finished medical school, ibu reminded me almost every day to clean up this room, but I never really had time as I had to settle up some important errands. Then one day, my sister and I decided that we can't let this happen anymore, so we spent the whole day cleaning up this room. And guess what. We managed to clean up everything in a day, and it made me wonder, why all this while I'd been postponing it haha. 

Here's the result!

Files are organised according to the content

Things that did not spark joy were donated/ thrown away

I decided to not let go of books that do not spark joy since we have extra space here 

We reused pretty cups and boxes to place stationaries

These 3 cupboards contain my stuff

Tidying up this room made me realised that most of the things in that room are mine haha. I don't know why do I have so many things.

I did it guys! Hehe.

Anyway, how do you usually tidy up your room?
Do you follow any method?
Do share with me :)

Sep 9, 2019

Finally, a doctor

Have you ever thought of quitting something when you were almost at the end?
Have you ever cried so hard inside, but pretended you were okay? 
Have you ever felt like giving up and wanted to run away, but you just can't?
Have you ever felt like giving up, but you know you'd regret it?

I had. 

This event of my life deserves a post here. IMU has so many professional examinations that make me lost count. What I knew, on the 6th of August (Tuesday), I had my final professional examination, the last exam as a medical student in IMU. IMU has a different system from other universities. I had OBA, EMQ and 16-OSCE stations in Semester 9, and I thought that was already the toughest exam.

The exam in our final semester (semester 10) consisted of a long case and viva on our 10 portfolios. It was easier than semester 9, but definitely not as easy as "Don't worry, you don't have to study also can pass." But what I can say, Semester 10 is one of the best semesters that I'd ever had as a medical student in IMU.

The whole batch was divided into 2 big groups; about 2/3 in Batu Pahat, and another 1/3 in Kluang. I was posted in Kluang. 5 months spent there and I had no regret. I really, really enjoyed my time in Kluang. The lecturers were helpful and inspiring, and my groupmates (especially Wen Yee, Law, Kirthirna and Marsaid) were the best. They were hardworking, and fun at the same time. I remember I'd been in a situation where I was so scared and shy to share anything or answer questions, but with them, I felt free to share thoughts, answer questions and performed examinations whenever I was asked by the doctors, sometimes voluntarily. They made me felt confident and never a second they underestimated me. Some people say a good environment will help you to grow, and I second that. 

Long story cut short, 5 months had gone and there were 2 weeks left before the exam. We already submitted our portfolios and I was really glad I managed to complete it. I like all the cases that I had chosen and written. I remember that day when I handed in the portfolio, I was like, "Okay, now it's just the exam left." Lol I wished it would be as easy as how I said it haha.

I started to feel a bit stressful. Palpitations came on and off. I had a few breakdowns. The hardest part was not only the breakdowns, but also how to make no one noticed. There was once I cried before going for on-call, then I told myself to stay strong, drove to the hospital and talked to patients like nothing happened. It was NOT easy. That was why most of the study week break I spent at home. I felt less stressful at home. Alhamdulillah, food was always available (yes hungry can make me feel sad also). By the time I went back to Kluang a few days before the exam, I felt more energetic and motivated. But, I still had breakdowns. Why so many breakdowns? Haha I have no idea.

Alhamdulillah, I have supportive family and friends. Ibu, ayah and my sister, Ica were always there willing to call me anytime whenever I needed someone to talk to. They always reminded me; "Allah tak kejam kat hamba dia yang dah berusaha. Awak dah usaha. Buat yang terbaik, then doa and tawakkal." My brother, Aiman sent funny gifs and cartoons in Whatsapp. Tiara willingly became a shoulder for me to cry on. She made me felt motivated and increased my confidence. Sara was always there as well. Although she was busy preparing for her marriage, she would never ignore my call and text. S slept late to listen to me ranting even though he loves sleeping and pantang if someone disturbs his sleeping time haha yes he still does (but he did more than that actually, thank you S!). Ummi kept telling me to pass this exam so we can jalan together haha. Anis gave me a lot of study and exam tips. She always sent me a long texts, answering my short question, making sure that I really understood it. From time to time, Sarah would check on me, how were my preparation and stuff. Sanaa, Nadia, Nawal, Kak Ummi and Farhah were soooo helpful. I stayed with them a few days before exam. We revised together, laughed together, made fun together, ate together.

There were a lot other people who involved, which I could have never done without them. I am really really really thankful to have them in my life. I would never trade these people with anything else in this world. They are so selfless, so kind. They inspired me in ways that I don't think they've ever realised. Thank you!

Okay now, I present to you *drum roll*..

The doctors from ME214!

Oath-taking Ceremony 

With Dato' Kanda

With Prof Nazimah and Datuk Soo 

With Prof James 

With Dato' Siva

My groupmates! Not in the photo: Jennifer, Luo Bin, Marsaid
With Aunty Magis 

With Sister Siti 

With Kak Zai

And last but not least, 

Alhamdulillah. Thank you Allah for this.

Finally, a doctor. 

Jun 1, 2019

Getting Out of Comfort Zone

Easier said than done. 
I challenged myself to do something that I had never done before. 
Did I succeed?
Assalamualaikum and hi guys! 

I loveeee challenges and adventures and I love to challenge myself. The phrase 'easier said than done' is definitely true, but I will always try to prove it wrong, although sometimes I fail. A few weeks ago, I saw someone retweeted a tweet about Baju Raya Project JB and the team was finding 150 volunteers. I instantly sent an email to the person-in-charge, telling her about my intention to volunteer. I did ask a few of my friends if they wanna join, but they had some errands on that day. This is my first time going out of my comfort zone. Usually, in any events that I participate or volunteer, there would be someone I know, but this time I knew no one.

The place was not that far from Kluang to JB, but if I wanna reach on the same day before 8.30am, I would have to leave my Kluang house probably around 6 something. I rather go there one day earlier, and luckily my friend, Nani was so kind (you're always kind, Nani hehe), she offered me staying at her house for a night. Well, actually I was the one buat muka tak malu tanya whether I could stay overnight, and she and her kind friends immediately said okay, which I felt so so so grateful for hehe.

Baju Raya Project is an annual event done in the month of Ramadan, where nice clothes are collected, 'filtered' and sorted into a few categories and sizes before they are sent to orphanages, old folk homes, poor families, etc as a donation. I think this is a brilliant idea. You know, when you have unused nice clothes, probably you've only worn them once, but you don't know any place where you can donate them, Baju Raya Project is the perfect place where you can send to.

Early in that morning, I was in a HUGE dilemma; contemplating whether I should go or not. Unwanted thoughts appeared in my mind as I was getting ready; What if I couldn't make any friends? What if it is so awkward? What if I don't know where to go? Maybe better if I don't go at all?

I literally almost gave up and texted one of the committee members to tell them I was not able to go due to some circumstances, but before I did, I asked myself, "If not now, then when?"

I gathered back my courage, left Nani's place and drove to Masjid Al Jawahir, Johor Bahru. It was only about 10min away. By the time I reached the mosque, I almost made a U-turn. But the determination in me was definitely stronger than I thought so I parked my car and went into the mosque. I was assigned to be as a 'runner' where I had to pass the clothes from the 'quality control' team, which consisted of a few people, to the sizing-sort person. I sat down and began my work. I guess the tegur-je-sesiapa characteristic runs in the family and the moment I sat down, I instantaneously chatted with everyone around me hehe. I used to be someone who was okay to not talk to anyone, but nowadays I'm more to someone who prefers talking haha. I made some new friends! I was really grateful to follow my instinct and stayed. If not, I'd still be in my comfort zone.

Did I succeed then? The answer is a big YES.

Spot me! Oh you can never spot me cs I was standing somewhere at the back, gave up untuk berhimpit and jengket kaki haha

Do you have anything that you really wanna do, but you've never done?
If it's a good thing, go for it!

May 18, 2019

Write. Save. Repeat.

I'd been writing and saving posts in draft, but yet, did not publish them. Blame my laziness to continue typing and end up writing them halfway. Anyway, I have a new resolution. 

I'm thinking of starting writing like on weekly basis, at least. Since this is my final semester in medical school (InshaaAllah!) and although I don't fancy roller coaster rise, but these few months will definitely be a thrilled ride for sure and publishing the stories here might be a good idea since I don't have a diary. 

 A quick summary of my current life. 

  • For semester 10 aka the final semester, I am posted in Hospital Enche' Besar Hajjah Khalsom, Kluang. This semester we are supposed to 'shadow' housemen, which sometimes I think we really ARE shadows, like what Dato' Siva told us haha. 
  • I started with Internal Medicine posting. It was amazing. Never thought I could love Internal Medicine as much as I did here. Well, although I have to admit that I'm still not that good in reading ECGs, but I definitely know more than before hehe, but that's not enough and I really need to brush it up! 
  • Next, I was in Obstetrics and Gynaecology posting. It has always been one of my favourite postings and I somehow can imagine myself delivering babies and scrubbing in as a surgeon to perform hysterectomy. The doctors and nurses were super helpful! I was given a chance to even conduct the delivery on my own! Which I refused and asked to assist instead haha. I managed to assist in a few number of deliveries. And I did manage to observe few surgeries inc ELLSCS, EMLSCS, cystectomy of endometrioma, TAHBSO, female sterilisation, etc. 
  • Currently, I'm in Surgery and Orthopaedics postings. Yes, they are combined in this 5-week duration. It's a bit hectic since we have to do 2 portfolios (for Viva), but so far so good. I always enjoy both of these postings, even back then when I was in Hospital Tuanku Jaafar, Seremban. Other than O&G, these are my favourite postings! I know right, it seems like I like most of the postings haha. It will be difficult to choose a field to specialise in, although for now in a long run I wanna become a surgeon, whether general surgeon, Obs and Gynae or Orthopaedics, I haven't made up my mind, but of course, I have to pass the very final exam first! Wish me luck hehe. 

Ahh, finally a complete post I can publish. I can't promise, but I will try my best to publish posts as frequent as possible. My Kluang house does not have wifi fyi, and my mobile internet rarely becomes 4G. Yes, most of the time it is E hm so slow like siput, even siput is faster..

Till here first. Bye!  

Jan 14, 2019

A Year Older, But Am I A Year Wiser?

You know how people always say a year old, a year wiser. 
I had never said it before until I posted a photo on my Instagram a few days ago.
I always write things ONLY if I really mean it.
And I had a long pause before typing that sentence, thinking ... 

... am I really a year older, and ALSO a year wiser? 

Not one year, or two years, but for many years, I doubted myself. I knew that I learned a lot as time passed because Allah blesses our lives so beautiful from A to Z that not a single day would pass with nothing to learn from. But, that was not the issue. I wondered, did all those life events make me a wiser person? Am I a better person than who I was before? 

I am not aware if my personality changes, but one thing for sure, my way of thinking does change somehow. I remember being someone who cared a lot about everything, including things that were out of my control ie. how people treat me. I treated people the nicest way possible, and expected people to treat me the way I did. And when they did not, my heart crushed.

I learned that I should always treat others nicely, give people a smile, make things easy for someone, but never, ever, ever expect anything in return.

When it comes to my family, they are always number one in my heart. There was this one semester I was so kiasu. So kiasu that even though I went back home, but my heart was never home. I felt restless because I could not study at home like there was no one at home understood that I needed to study. But actually, home brings me long-term peace and joy. Ever since I understood that home is not exactly a place, it's more like a feeling of having people you love close to you, I cherish time with my beloved ones more than before. My family and my close friends are my home. They are my support system. Without them, I might not be able to be where I am now. Instead of thinking I can't study at home, I make it as the best place for me to study.

I am a year older now, which means my parents are a year older as well. I wanna be a really good daughter to them. Nothing I do would equal to things they did for me, but at least I want them to be able to say, "Alhamdulillah. I'm really proud of my children."

These are just some examples. I hope that I would get wiser and wiser as getting older and older. InshaaAllah.

P/s: Excuse my excited-could-not-wait-to-eat face haha. Ibu said I looked different and my ecstatic face was enough to tell I was so eager to eat haha.